This post will kill two birds with one stone – and three if you count the chicken thighs I used.

A few days ago, some friends explained the process of preparing fried rice. Nothing overly complex, but there are a few ingredients that I had seldom used. Also, I had never cooked mustard greens. As the ever-intrepid food-a-holic, I embraced the opportunity and decided to combine the two. I’ll explain the basic process of fried rice, as it was told to me (with some of my input), and also weave in where I used the mustard leaves.

You’ll need:

  • long-grain already cooked rice; I’d stick with something neutral in flavor, or Jasmine.
  • oil; again, as neutral as possible; superlight olive oil or sunflower oil – or for some more flavor, peanut or sesame. I’m still on the fence about Canola.
  • garlic; washed and finely chopped.
  • green onions; washed and cut – these make the dish.
  • sauces: oyster, fish, soy. If you have wheat allergies, I’m sure you know to make sure your sauces are gluten free. If you are AVERSE to any of these sauces, let me know of some AltERnatiVES.
  • salt & pepper (not to be confused with Salt-n-Pepa)

Optional, though suggested:

  • veggies; carrots, onions, snow peas, broccoli, and so on – you pick. Make sure to wash and clean them before chopping them into uniform bits, big enough to keep shape after a quick sauté. This is where the mustard fits in. Though they wilt somewhat quickly, it’s best to add them a bit early if you don’t like their bitterness, and also to soften them up a little.
  • cilantro, basil, and other herbs for finishing. Wash and run your knife through these two or three times. Use your senses!
  • a protein, be it chicken, pork, eggs, tofu, etc. Chop into bite-sized bits. If using eggs, you’ll scramble them after the other ingredients are cooked.

Totally optional:

  • another protein!
  • chile oil, or chile peppers, or something spicy.

You’ll also need:

  • two large pans, depending on how much you’re making (but large enough to hold the contents of the other pan)
  • chef’s knife/cutting board
  • vessels for holding your prepped items. If you’re cooking meat, avoid cross contamination! I use a green board for veg and red for meat, but that’s not entirely necessary.
  • wooden spoon/spatulas/etc

We’re going to do this in two parts. First, cooking the veg and proteins, then the rice, then mixing the two. So let’s get a move on!

Prep all your ingredients. Get your oil as hot as possible. You’ll need to work quickly, so get ready to move. Add the garlic. If you’re not adding the suggested stuff, move to the next paragraph – otherwise: add veg and protein in order of longest cook time first. You want to cook the veg but keep them crunchy in the center. Broccoli and carrots cook slower than onions, for example. Always keep the pan’s contents moving so they don’t stick and burn – remember, the pan is hot! Season with the sauces. About 2-3 minutes before the above pan’s contents are ready, heat another pan (unless you’re only adding the eggs – just use the one pan) and scramble the eggs. A little runny is fine, as the residual heat will continue to cook them. Transfer the scrambled eggs to the other pan. Lightly clean, oil, and return the egg pan to the heat, as you’ll use it to cook the rice.

Add the rice to your hot, oiled pan, breaking it apart with a wooden spoon. Season with your sauces to taste. A little goes a long way – so if these ingredients are unfamiliar to you, add them slowly. You can always add more, but can never remove it. Also, the fish sauce smells gross. After all, it’s usually made from fermented sardines or other salty fish. Taste it on its own at your own risk – I have.

Finally, mix the two together in one of the pans. Taste. Whichever sauces you think are necessary, salt and pepper. Mix in or garnish with green onion, herbs, and the spicy component!

The mustard greens added a mild bitterness, and some contrasting texture to the rest of the dish – both things with which I was pleased. And I apologize for any temporal confusion you may have endured. I blame that on all the Dr. Who episodes streaming through my computer. As always, if you have any questions/comments please let me know. I’d love to clarify any confusion or hear what you think. Also – I’ll soon be posting another recipe with the mustard greens. Till then!